


No Trap Needed

by Arsenic



Category: DCU (Comics), Outsiders (Comics), Red Hood and the Outlaws (Comics), Red Hood/Arsenal (Comics), Teen Titans (Comics)
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Powers, Fluff, Gen, Holidays, Kid Fic, M/M, Single Parents
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-22
Updated: 2018-12-22
Packaged: 2019-09-24 12:18:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,899
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17100461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arsenic/pseuds/Arsenic
Summary: Lian's made a new BFF.  Now just to make them for-reals-actualfax sisters.





	No Trap Needed

**Author's Note:**

  * For [JenJo](https://archiveofourown.org/users/JenJo/gifts).



> This is unbeta'ed because it was a treat and I am pretty casual about treats. 
> 
> I hope the recip enjoys this, it was such a great prompt for the square "kids playing matchmaker."

Lian meets her Best Friend Forever on the first day of sixth grade. Sixth grade is the last grade in elementary school and Lian is just counting the days until junior high. Dad tells her there are more kids in junior high and maybe there will be ones more to her liking. Lian's not _too_ hopeful, but she figures at least she'll be a year older. That's something.

In any case, Lian notices the new girl immediately, because she has a white streak in her dark brown hair, which is awesome. Lian chooses the seat next to her in home room and says, "I'm Lian, I like your hair."

The girl looks up from the book she's reading and says, "Oh. Oh, I mean, thanks. I'm Hafsa."

"Hafsa," Lian tries out the name slowly. "That's a cool name."

Hafsa smiles. She has crooked teeth, the same as Lian. She says, "My dad says it means 'lioness.' He says my mom gave it to me because she wanted me to be fierce."

Lian doesn't miss the fact that information about Hafsa's mom was conveyed by her dad. Tentatively, she says, "My dad says my mom's like a cat in general."

Granted, her dad usually follows that up with, "Comes around when she wants love and is willing to take on creatures ten times her size," but it's always said with fondness. Lian's only met her mom a few times, but she can kind of see what he means by it. 

Hafsa says, "My dad and I just moved from Gotham."

Lian's eyes widen. "Have you ever seen Batman?"

Hafsa laughs. "Better. I saw Batwoman."

*

By mid-year, they've made blood vows of friendship forever, pretty much live at each other's houses, and have plotted out the trajectory of their lives, starting with becoming legal sisters by way of getting their dads married.

Sure, they haven't really nailed out the details of how to make that happen, but they're not super concerned about that part. It should be easy enough to just keep getting the two together, right?

Obviously, one of the easiest ways to make that happen is to disappear. Then their dads will _have_ to work together to find them.

*

Jason had thought getting Hafsa away from Gotham, from Rabat, from anywhere that held memories for him and dangers for her would make things easier. After all, how much trouble could a twelve year old get into in the best school district in the safest suburb of Star City?

Evidently a lot. Jason really should have seen that coming. She has his genetics. His and Talia's, and honestly, what was he even thinking when he decided _not_ to get her implanted with a GPS tag?

It's a Friday evening when Roy Harper calls him and says, "Just thought I'd check in on the brain-twins, make sure you don't need anything."

Even though he already knows the answer, Jason makes himself ask, "They're not with you?"

Roy sighs and says, "Fuck. I'd really hoped my daughter would make it to her actual teen years before I had to ground her for life."

"Wishes and horses, friend," Jason says. "If you were two twelve year old girls intent on getting into trouble, where would you go?"

"Put on a pot of coffee, would you?" Roy asks. "I'll be over in ten."

"Coffee it is."

*

Roy arrives in seven minutes, which means he drove like a maniac. Jason approves. He's barely gotten the door open when Roy stumbles in and says, "On the way over here, I remembered I did that app thing? Where you can find your kid's phone? And let's face it, Lian's phone might as well be implanted. Here's where it gets weird, though: her phone says she's at the library over on Elm."

Jason closes the door behind Roy and walks toward the kitchen, where he's set out two mugs. The library is making him think of something if only he could—"Oh. I know what they're doing."

"Is the library even _open_ at nine?" Roy asks. "Are they shooting up outside a library? Is my kid a heroin addict and I don't even know it? Am I going to be on Maury explaining how I'm not actually the world's worst parent?"

Jason pours them each a cup listening to this. "Maury?"

Roy shrugs and takes the proffered cup. "It was the first trashy show that came to mind."

"Pretty sure they just faked our signatures to be let into the Anime Overnight that library has once a month, but we can check for track marks once we've confined them to their rooms for eternity."

Roy blinks. "Yeah, okay, that seems plausible. How are you so calm?"

Jason is not calm. Jason is two milliseconds from shitting himself, the way he always is whenever Hafsa manages to do something that makes him think she might be dead on the street and he might not even know it. "I'm pretty sure pre-pubescent girls can smell fear. Like jaguars, but worse."

"They do," Roy says, morose, sipping at his coffee. "So, we going to the library?"

"Why do you think I put the coffee in to-go mugs?" Jason asks, and swipes his keys from the counter.

*

Lian has to wait to see Hafsa at school on Monday, since they're both grounded from the phone and have been since their dads came and pulled them out of the Anime night. They meet by Hafsa's locker, and Lian asks, "So, think it worked?"

Hafsa nods. "Definitely. Pretty sure they were texting all weekend."

"Totally worth being grounded."

"Especially since we got to see _Castle of Cagliostro_."

"Agreed."

Hafsa brushes her bangs out of her face. "Phase two?"

They put out their fists to start the secret handshake they've perfected over the months. Once done, Lian says, "Phase two."

*

Jason is relieved to see that Roy is the other parent helping out with the Civil Rights Walk field trip. He loves Hafsa and wouldn't do a single thing in his life different knowing that it might mean not having her--which is saying _a lot_ \--but there's Hafsa, there's even Hafsa and Lian, and then there's forty sixth graders let free from the confines of the school building for a day.

Roy asks, "Do you feel like you agreed to this in a fugue state? Like maybe you weren't completely aware of and responsible for your actions?"

"Oh, I'm pretty sure Hafsa got me drunk first." 

Roy blinks. Jason laughs. "Joking. I stopped drinking when Talia told me she was pregnant. In the same week I stopped smoking, picking bar fights, and being on friendly terms with my neighborhood pot seller."

"Too bad about that last," Roy says. "Got a feeling today would be easier with a little of the Mary Jane."

Jason snorts. "Just until we were put in jail for reckless endangerment of the future generation."

"Woulda been fun while it lasted."

Jason can't argue with that.

*

The four of them end up going to dinner after the field trip. Both Lian and Hafsa are so tired they accept kid's menus without even bothering to put on a front about not being kids. Jason's chest hurts with how much he loves Hafsa, bent over the disposable menu with the green, yellow, blue, and red crayons the restaurant gave both girls, coloring oh-so-carefully in the lines. The girls are quietly discussing the names of the "monsters" they're coloring.

Roy says softly, "You…you're really good at handling the kids."

Jason looks over at him in disbelief. At one point he'd told a boy who was getting in another girl's space when she'd asked him to stop twice that if the kid did it again, he'd be stuck with Jason for the rest of the day, and Jason had once eaten a kid alive.

The teacher had very thoroughly explained how threats of violence were not appropriate. Of course, she'd also turned a blind eye to Jason making the "I'm watching you" gesture at the kid, so Jason suspected she'd been wanting to threaten violence for a while.

Roy smiles. "I would have taken the kid's arm right off. See if he touches anyone who's uninterested with his dominant arm missing."

Aside from a few quickies in sports bars here and there on nights when he'd managed to get a babysitter for Hafsa, Jason hasn't had time for sex or romance or even attraction since Talia and he'd agreed that he could provide a better home environment for their kid. It's unsettling to feel the curl of attraction that he does, because Roy is…Roy is not someone he's willing to blow in the bathroom. For a million different reasons.

Jason finds his voice and manages to say, "Uh, thanks?"

Roy opens his mouth to respond but the waiter arrives and by the time they've placed their orders, Jason's forgotten anything that came before. It's been a long day.

*

Lian comes down with a sinus infection two days before Thanksgiving, which is the _worst_ because she just knows it's going to ruin Phase Three. She text Hafsa apologizing, but Hafsa texts back, "didn't ur dad tell u? we're coming neway."

Sure enough, Lian wakes up from a nap that Thursday afternoon to Hafsa on the couch next to her, playing a video game with the sound off. She scooches in closer, and Hafsa looks down. "Hi sleepyhead."

"Mm," Lian says. "How's phase three?"

"I think they're trying to make a pecan pie together. It's gonna suck. Dad can cook just fine, but he blows at baking."

"My dad's pretty good at pies, we should be okay. Glad your dad brought the turkey, though. Dad always overcooks it because he's afraid of food poisoning."

Lian looks up and the two of them share a smile. See? This, this right here is why their dads should be together. It's a good thing they have Lian and Hafsa to think these things through.

*

Jason doesn't actually mean to duck down and lick the pecan filling off of Roy's thumb. It's as if his brain goes offline for half a second and he comes back to find himself in a compromising position. "Holy shit," he says. "I'm so—I don't—"

Then Roy's got his—still messy—hands on Jason's hips, crowding into his space. Jason's a big guy, but Roy matches him for height and muscle, and Jason's not resisting. His ass hits the lip of the kitchen counter gently. "Um."

Roy leans in and kisses him. It's not insistent, but it's definitely meant to make a point. He pulls back and asks Jason, "This okay?"

"Our daughters are in the other room."

"Jay, I hate to be the non-oblivious parent in this partnership and all, but those two hellions have been campaigning for this like feral monkeys in need of more bananas."

Jason considers this. After a minute he acknowledges, "Yeah, okay, I can see that."

"So, I ask again: this okay?"

Jason dives in for a quick kiss. "As long as we don't burn the pie. It's Hafsa's favorite and I fuck it up every year, and then I have to find a grocery store that's still open and not sold out and—"

Roy kisses him again. Jason nods, "Yeah, okay, that—"

Roy laughs while kissing him this time. "I promise we won't burn the pie."


End file.
